Eden... i need you to be okay

i was changing Eden's diaper two days ago, when i noticed something didn't look right in her leg/groin area. it's hard to describe the location, because she's so fat. i can't tell where one body part begins and another ends. anyway, i googled it, of course. i came up with three possibilities: hernia, hip dislocation, or a tumor. 


i decided to call the doctor, only to find that the office was closed for a funeral of a staff member. so, i had to wait until the next day for an appointment. 


i took Eden in yesterday, and showed the doctor what i was talking about. one leg-joint looked swollen, or like there was a lump, or something. one fat roll was almost entirely smoothed out. the doctor looked, poked, examined... and said "i think that's just the way Eden is. i feel normal bones and normal muscles. there is no hernia." phew! HUGE sigh of relief. then, she rolled Eden over, and noticed that none of the creases on the back of her legs matched up. 


she immediately said "i think we need to do a hip ultrasound. this is definitely not normal." crap. she explained all the stuff i had read about hip dislocation, and said that's what they were going to look for.


Eden has her ultrasound later today. i barely slept last night, and i'm so scared that something might be wrong with her. i'm worried it's something i caused. i'm worried she will need surgery. i'm worried it's something worse than a hip dislocation. 


this day is moving too slow. i need answers. i need to know she's okay.