christmas

it wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. it seems that the days i expect to be bad, aren't so bad (Carli's due date). but, the days i don't expect to matter at all... they usually suck the worst (7 month anniversary?). Of course, i thought about Carli (do i even need to say that anymore?) and there were a few moments of holding back tears... but nothing i feel like discussing.




Lillie was sick for christmas. christmas day wasn't so bad. the days before, she was so sick i was terrified to let her sleep at night. i've never been "one of those moms" but i guess i am now. i lost a lot of sleep... sneaking over to her to poke her, wake her up, make her drink water... make sure she was still alive. i even had her sleep in the floor of my room... and i never let the kids sleep anywhere but their beds. on christmas eve, she slept in her room- so "santa" could do his work. by christmas day she seemed to be getting better. thankfully, last night, i was able to sleep a little better. only to find that she woke up this morning with a bloody nose. of course- what do i think of? all those stories of people finding their kids dead in the morning, with blood running out of their nose. ugh.


poor Eden will never get any sleep. i'm going to be a nervous mess. i already am a nervous mess. i wake up in the middle of the night to poke and shake my belly until Eden moves. once she kicks a couple times, i can go back to sleep. i honestly think i might lose my mind very soon. i can't handle being this obsessive and paranoid.


anyway- back to christmas... ray got me an awesome camera. i've been wanting a new camera for sooooo long. yay!! so, maybe now my blog can include more pictures. like this one of the girls on christmas, with their new dolls:

and, i like this pair of pictures... waiting to open presents:

 

yay! presents! 

okay, we are bored.

they got so much stuff for christmas. last night, we went through their old toys to give some away. they were happy to pack the box as they discussed the kids who didn't have very many toys. my girls are so sweet. :)


i don't really remember what i got for ray... nothing as good as a camera. i did make a picture for him. it's a mosaic of all our pictures of Carli and Carli's name. check it out:

you really have to "know" the pictures to be able to recognize them. they are so tiny. it didn't turn out as well as i had hoped...

okay, now i'm going to leave you with a few pictures from our sledding adventure yesterday. the girls have never been sledding before. it was definitely interesting.

they had so much fun... for about 5 minutes. :)

this is right before Lynzie's sled flipped.

and this is when she decided she didn't want to play anymore.

Lillie was done too.

so, we went home. :)